Turok animated film on the way: it HAS to be better than Evolution

On my nightly Googletrek for the string “dinosaurs, machine guns”, I came across this Firing Squad article which included the above trailer for the upcoming presumably direct-to-DVD, animated Turok film.

Normally we’d be excited to see a film based on a game that seems to follow its source material so closely, but that clip just leaves us scratching our collective metal heads. Since when was Turok successful enough to warrant an American animated film? Sure, an anime maybe — the Japanese animate everything, from grocery lists, to every issue of Sports Illustrated to reruns of The Golden Girls — but to get the green light for a real American animated film, you’d need a series that was either tremendously successful or lends itself extremely well to the realm of the cartoon. Admittedly, “dinosaurs + guns = awesome” is a fantastic premise, but it’s been done before, as my childhood proves.

As a person of Cherokee descent I truly hope this film is taken seriously by its creators if only to bring honor to my people, but as a person who just lied to you about being a person of Cherokee descent, I couldn’t care less how this thing turns out.

Now if you’ll excuse me, it’s been a while since I’ve watched Heavy Metal, and my spirit animal recently informed me that Turok won’t have nearly as much nudity as that classic of the American cinema.