It was tough for me to come up with a concept for this article.
You see, I had the grand fortune of attending the Spike VGAs on Sunday night. It was an amazing opportunity and I had a blast … but afterwards I had no idea what I was going to write about. As I read in the live blog post Nick and the other editors did, it looked like most everyone watched the show when it aired live. What was I going to report on?
I thought it would be cute (and I say “cute” because this idea is not really all that great — it’s just, well, cute) if I just took you all through the entire process a lone blogger has to go through for an event such as the Spike VGAs.
So, I just grabbed all the pictures I took and put together a sort of “photo diary” documenting my time before, during, and after the show.
Hit the jump to have your life changed.*
*Not really.
The first step to going to an event as a blogger? Make sure you look good. If all else fails, always dress to impress. This wise piece of advice was taught to me by my blogging guru, Nick Chester. He is wise beyond his years …
But this may be the most pathetic thing of all time: I was obsessing about what to wear to the event that I actually tried out a “test outfit” two days before. I put on an outfit and wore it around Los Angeles for a day to gauge the reactions of perfect strangers.
Seriously. I did this.
Luckily the reactions were good, so the final fashion choice was decided:
Yeah. It is pretty darn underwhelming when looking back. A brown shirt and jacket? Real revolutionary, jackass.
After getting dressed I hopped into my Jeep and headed for the big event. Being a blogger, not only was I going to the event by myself, I most definitely was not showing up in a limo.
Look, here I am driving and being really serious about it:
Naturally, this being Los Angeles, I got caught in some of the worst traffic of all time.
To anyone that lives in this fine city, here is an image that should be all-too-familiar: the back of a gosh darned bus. (No wonder all the ambulance chasers in this city — such as Mr. Mason — get such good business.)
Because of the traffic I was running a little late. And that brought out the road rage.
You don’t want to mess with the guy in the above picture. Pretty darn intimidating, huh? Seriously, I totally understand if you want to run away from your computer screen right now in fear.
So as I slowly inched forward, one block at a time, one specific thought kept entering my mind: You know who probably isn’t running late? Neil Patrick Harris. You know why? BECAUSE HE IS IN A FREAKIN’ LIMO!
After thinking those horrible, snobby thoughts about Neil Patrick Harris, karma kicked in
Oh shit.
Yup, I almost ran out of gas on the way to the Spike VGAs.
Luckily, a petrol oasis appeared out of nowhere and satiated my need for fuel (and at less than $2 a gallon I didn’t spend much at all! Thank you, recession!).
Anyway … after filling up my tank I ended up making it to the venue — Sony Pictures Studios — with plenty of time to spare.
OMG FAMOUS PEOPLE COME HERE!
Navigating the sea of limos was a little tough, but my Jeep made it through just fine, eventually fitting snug in a tiny parking space at the top of the studio parking deck.
With anticipation running high, I made my way down the stairs to Will Call.
At Will Call there were two lines: ticket pick-up for celebrities and ticket pick-up for industry (i.e. bloggers).
The celebrity line was in an open area with an easily accessible booth.
This was the Will Call line for bloggers:
Dag.
After a fairly long wait in the surprisingly freezing cold weather, I received my ticket and made my way towards the venue.
Yay! My name! How cool!
Sadly, I could not take pictures on the red carpet unless I was standing behind the special press wall, and since I was attending the show and not technically reporting on it I just had to walk on by. But I think I saw a couple of celebrities that I could have sworn whispered “Also, cocks” while blowing kisses my way. I think one of them even flashed me. I’m not saying who.
Making my way through a special entrance in the back, I passed by some poor, pretty girls that were standing outside in the freezing cold weather trying to promote Guitar Hero for mobile phones.
Being the gentleman I am, I quickly took this opportunity to try out the game, get a picture with the frozen beauties, and walk away without once offering either of them my jacket.
Man, I am a jerk.
After saying good-bye to my new friends I strolled into the giant sound stage and was shown to my seat. While all the celebrities and very important people sat in lush white couches at the very front of the show, most of the industry and bloggers were relegated to the back part of the auditorium to sit on awkwardly-shaped glass chairs set up in small groups around tables. Not that they were bad seats by any means (to the contrary!), I just thought I would mention the set-up to help visualize the situation.
Now, this is where the story gets amazing. Prepare yourself if you are a fan of adventure games.
First off, when I sat down, a waitress walked up to me and asked me what I wanted to drink. Wait, drinks? What the heck? To my surprise, they were serving free booze to all the attendees. And not just in the time leading up to the live show – they were serving drinks all night long!
Right before my vodka cranberry (don’t laugh) arrived, a large group of people sat down in my section. From how much they were talking with each other, I knew right away that they were together.
Once they all got comfortable I introduced myself as Chad Concelmo from Destructoid.com.
Not only did they know immediately what Destructoid was (yay!), this is what one of them said next:
“Nice to meet you! My name is Brad and we all work for Double Fine.”
This is when I spilled my just-delivered drink all over my hand.
I was sitting with all the Double Fine people.
Double Fine. The company that made Psychonauts and the upcoming Jack Black-starring Brütal Legend.
And these weren’t just any people from Double Fine. No, these were some of the main designers.
I was sitting with some of the people that designed Psychonauts.
And here they are (well, some of them at least):
It goes without saying that I talked their ears off for the next fifteen minutes about how much I respect their company, how much I adore (ADORE!) Psychonauts, how much I am looking forward to Brütal Legend, and how much I want to put babies in all of them.
Luckily, they were all so nice and (I think) enjoyed hearing my kind words.
At this point the lights went down and the show began.
I won’t get too much into what happened during the show since most of you watched it (check out Nick’s awesome post for the winners). Seeing it live, though, was pretty cool. And while I had mixed feelings about the show overall, I do have to say that Jack Black was a fantastic host and his opening sequence where he was having sex with all the consoles almost made me fall off my chair laughing.
Here are a few shots I took during the show, just to prove that I was badass since you weren’t allowed to take pictures while the performance was live:
During one of the last commercial breaks, though, it happened.
I was laughing again with some of the Double Fine people and he walked up the aisle.
Tim (freakin’) Schafer.
The man who made Psychonauts, Day of the Tentacle, Full Throttle, and Grim Fandago stood before me.
Honestly, I don’t remember exactly why he walked up since I couldn’t hear his conversation over all the school girl giggling emitting from my stupid face. I assume he was there to congratulate his team on the awesome promotion Brütal Legend was getting that night.
Before I had the chance to jump on top of and dry hump one of my gaming heroes, Brad from Double Fine thankfully interjected by introducing me to Mr. Schafer.
Brad: “Tim, this is Chad from Destructoid.”
Me: *standing up* “Mr. Schafer, I am a gigantic fan.”
Tim Schafer: *looking me up and down* “Wow. You are gigantic.”
With that, he walked away.
It was the most amazing thing that has ever happened to me.
And, of course, I was too awestruck to get a picture.
Obviously, after that experience the rest of the night was a little bit of a letdown. Not really — as I had a great time — but how can you top a classic meeting with one of the greatest game designers of all time?!
As the show wrapped up with Grand Theft Auto IV wining the big award, I said farewell to the Double Fine people (ZOMG CALL ME!) and headed outside.
After maneuvering my way through the giant crowds of people I eventually made it back to my old, trusty Jeep. “The night was a giant success,” I thought to myself as I turned up the volume on the radio and drove down the winding, congested parking deck. “Being a videogame blogger is the greatest gig in the world.”
Oh, and then there was the epic after-party. But that, my friends, is a photo diary for another time …
