Come celebrate the holidays with our annual Destructoid Christmas Card

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[It may be Christmas Day, but that doesn’t mean it’s too late to request a belated holiday card! Get yer orders in. Digital cards should be incoming sometime today!]

It’s that time of year again! No, not the time of year where Uncle Terry gets drunk at 2pm, slips in the frozen section at Trader Joe’s, and spends the weekend in the emergency room (though that of course will happen), it’s time for the 2018 Destructoid Officially Unofficial Christmas and Possibly Other Holidays I’m Not Your Real Dad Card Bonanza!

Our resident best friend, best lover, and best girl MeanderBot has taken time out of his busy schedule of making sexually explicit drawings of local dairy delivery men to make sexually comforting drawings to put on Christmas cards to send out to you, the loyal and fun-loving Destructoid Community. It’s a time-honored tradition that I think we might have skipped last year.

Let’s not do that again. Let’s celebrate the camaraderie that only Destructoid can provide. Let us send you a Christmas card!

This lovingly hand-crafted card can be delivered to your front door (or sewer grate, or hospital bed), hopefully in time for Christmas! As he is wont to do, Mr. Destructoid battles the forces of evil and saves the world from suckiness. This time, he’s the fearless Geralt as he battles his toughest foe yet — Krampus! Look, he’s got a whip and a mini broom and everything! Dude’s tough.

But as all regulars know, Mr. Destructoid is a lover, not a fighter. He’s always down to use his fists, but prefers the nicer kind of fist-action. Don’t we all? He and Krampus discover the true meaning of the holiday season: Doing your best to not eat children. And I think that’s something we can all get behind.

Fill out this handy-dandy form to put your name on the list for a card to be sent to your home! We’re asking that for now, only US residents apply for a physical card. If you’re an international user and would like a digital Christmas card with a hand-typed note, please feel free to email me at tacos@destructoid.com and we’ll write something nonsensical for you to enjoy along with your digital card. It’s the least we could do, right?

The best part of all of this? The cards are free! We’re not demanding anyone pay a dime! That said, if you can throw a few bucks into the ol’ PayPal tip jar to make this whole thing worth it, all proceeds go directly to our artist, MeanderBot, to help him cover the costs of printing and shipping. ‘Tis the season, right folks? His email address is insignificantuser@gmail.com. Support your local Community artists.

Thanks again to MeanderBot for his hard work, and Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, and everything else in between, ya knuckleheads!


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Wes Tacos
Contest Baboon, part-time Mod, full-time dick joke specialist. Destructoid's official Hot Biscuits. I've personally backed exactly one KickStarter/crowdfunding project: Sony's PlayStation, by Dtoid community member darrenhupke.